Sunday, 6 January 2013
Tampon crafting brings people together like world peace. Sort of.
This is what I love about blogging: one minute you’re discovering new-to-you bloggers that share a similar sense of humour/insanity and the next you’re on all forms of social media discussing tampon crafts. Where else can you find other people who appreciate the fine art of tampon toupee-making? It brings a fucking tear of gratitude to my eye…good thing I have my tampon hanky at the ready in case of unexpected crying due to cyber-happiness.
I decided to delve a little deeper into the vast unknown that is tampon crafting because I think it’s fucking genius (possibly the mentally disturbed kind of genius, but that’s often the best kind) and also I’m kicking myself for not discovering this back in the spring when I had a hysterectomy and no longer had a use for lady plugs (and trust me, trying to figure out what to do with a box of tampons was a fucking conundrum…throwing them away seemed like a big waste, giving them away seemed weird, because would you not be a little freaked out if some stranger asked you “hey, want some tampons?”. I also debated leaving them in the building lobby in the spot where people leave free stuff. I once found a box of about 50 extra small condoms there, which lead me to believe Frodo the hobbit is a tenant in my building and apparently he’s decided to stop being a horny little whore and choose a life of celibacy. Hence the tiny-condom giveaway. Also, Superman is my next-door neighbour. I know this because I saw him smoking on his balcony on Xmas Day wearing his outfit, including the cape. Did I mention I live in the best apartment building in the history of EVER? Fuck yes I do)
Anyfuckingway, I’m bummed about this tampon-crafting-discovery because now it’s way too late to throw myself a hysterectomy party with a uterus cake, tampon party favours and games like Uterus Hacky Sack and Fallopian Tube Sword Fighting.